No turning back

For the first time ever I haven't felt the need to turn back. Usually I question my decision on leaving him alone only to find myself trying to woo him back. This time I feel it's what's emotionally necessary for the both of us. Not necessarily on to the next one, but learning from a lot of mistakes made and trying not to repeat them. The sad thing is, I don't know when the time will come when I have to put these lessons to use. It could be next month or several years. Will I have forgotten them by then? I just hope the heart stores a special place for love lessons and putting them into practice when the time is right.

Blah I'm just rambling. I'm up on cloud 9 and it's invoking a lot of emotions.

I always try to name my posts something witty in hopes to inspire people to be want to read what i'm writing. I suck at it though so it's whatever. I don't want to "work on it" because I think wit is something that should come natural, not be learned.

So Tumblr seems to be the big to do now? I'm sure I'm probably late because I JUST got a twitter account, which I deleted because I only used it to stalk my ex anyway, i'm sure Tumblr has been around for years before my knowledge. This girl linked me to her Tumblr page and it was pretty sexy. It had porn clips, shoes and music which is a recipe for greatness. The past few times I've checked it, I've been uninspired. I wish she gets her mojo back.

I'mma blog I'mma blog I'mma mother effin blog

This year I'm determined to have a body. I'm tired of feeling like a shapeless blob. I fell off on my cardio workouts but I plan on getting back on track. I used to could do 4 miles in 30 minutes on the elliptical and now I can barely get to 3 miles.  I just need to get back into the swing of things.

I have so much on my mind but our conversations always get me to thinking. Daydreaming. I wish I could bottle up all the good feelings and just let it out when I need to. So much has transpired it's crazy. Certainly not normal and certainly understandable.

The nerve of some men

This dude whom I met online that I used to talk to on a regular basis is really feeling himself. Him and I used to be cool but we had a falling out and stopped talking. Somehow we started talking about but this time very infrequently. Every time he always hits me up on some he wants to marry me and fly me to where he's at tip. I'll stop talking to him for a few days and he ALWAYS hits me up first.  Now he's acting as if I'm sweating him and people are just going to eat that up. Blah!

Getting over someone --The "Anti" rules

We've all had the displeasure of going through the process of getting over someone you really cared for and maybe even *gasp* Loved. Unfortunately for me it was so long between the last one and this one that I apparently have forgotten all the rules. I've tried the whole try to call and replace him with someone else but just like when you're on a diet and you say you're going to not eat sweets, the only thing you can think about it sweets so eventually you cave in? Well It's so much like that. So I'm going to test a new theory. Keep in mind that this theory is currently in practice so I'll have to make up/edit as I go.

Rule #1
Block him from all forms of internet contact, if possible. I'm talking facebook, twitter, email, etc. This is going to narrow down that the only way to contact him is via phone. (This is important)

Rule #2
Call. Yes Call. This is going back to the sweets/diet analogy. If you're anything like me he's the only one you're craving. The key to calling, is to call at a time when you know he probably WON'T answer. This is the disappointment phase. Again like on a diet when give into a desert and it's not even as good as you thought it should have been. It's like "I ruined my diet for this?"  If you get disappointed enough at not hearing his voice, you won't even bother calling.

Rule#3
No texting and this corresponds to rule 2 try not to call from your own phone. Remember the goal is still NOT to talk to him and you don't want to be able to go back on last month's phone bill and see his number listed a hundred times. Use another person's phone or in my case, the house phone because that bill isn't in my name so I don't see it. 

I've changed my mind

In true loose coilz fashion, I've changed my mind. It's too late for any resolutions and I need to abort the mission before I lose even more than I already have. I have a million other blessings and it's time to refocus my energy on something worthwhile. Peace be unto you.

"I've got myself to remind me of love"

If that's not one of the most under rated lines ever, I don't know what is. I've listened to that song and sung the lyrics a million times (Happy Feelings- Frankie Beverly and Maze) and never paid that line any attention. I'll be damned if it's not the truth or at least a truth that everyone should be striving for.